Infidelity / Cheaters

Emotional Affairs

Emotional Affairs … Yep, It’s Still Cheating

Playful e-mails.  Flirtatious texts.  Engaging cell phone conversations.   Seemingly harmless lunch meetings.  There is no sex, but there is still trouble in paradise.

One may reason that these are innocent actions, but think again.  Many affairs are a result of one of two personal needs: physical intimacy or emotional intimacy.  People look outside of their relationships to find happiness, comfort, and excitement.   This can be sexual, but in many cases it is not.  It is about emotion.

Here is an example of a long-married couple, Chris and Tiffany.  For years Chris and Tiffany have been becoming more and more distant.  Tiffany felt isolated and ignored.  Chris never asked about her workday, her feelings, or her dreams.  Life had become dull until Tiffany met Mike.  Mike was her mentor at work.  He helped her learn the ropes and get on the right track.  Soon enough Tiffany and Mike began eating lunch together, sending flirtatious e-mails to one another, and spending hours on the phone.  Tiffany had never felt so special.  She thought about Mike all the time. 

Tiffany did not believe that she was doing anything wrong; she wasn’t having sex.  But, Chris could see his wife was changing.  She became more distant and their marriage suffered.  Even though Tiffany was not having sex, she was still having an Emotional Affair.  Her attention and affection was devoted to her coworker Mike, not her husband Chris.  The trust in the marriage was broken. 

While emotional cheating does not include physical intimacy, it does involve secrecy, deception, and betrayal.   That is the most painful aspect of any affair, whether it involves sex or not: the breach of trust.  How can I trust you again?  How can I trust anyone?  These are the most plaguing questions.  Emotional affairs cause just as much pain, doubt, and distrust. 

In these situations one may think that it is just a blossoming friendship, but often times they turn into a romantic relationship or even a sexual relationship.  A healthy male-female relationship should not be secret. 

Be aware.  Look at the signs.  You or your spouse may be involved in an Emotional Affair.  How far are you willing to let it go?  At Maley Investigations, we can be there to stop it before it goes too far.